Friday, 24 April 2009

Don't get your hopes up dear.

A child's dictionary to prepare them for the real world, so it won't come as a shock later. excellent work.

Thursday, 26 March 2009

Irregular update

There's been little activity on here recently, partly because i feel i have little of worth to say at the moment. Mostly i've been working, seeing the girlfirend or working on the film that will eventually get made at my cinema.
This is what i felt was worth writing about today, as yesterday Dan and I bashed out most of the plot for the Cineworld Zombie movie, which just proves that we love to make things difficult for ourselves, we decide to make a movie on no budget and it immediately has to have extras and effects make up. oh Well, at least we're not trying to get inot a festival or anything this time, we're just doing it for oursleves. When there's a properly written plot outline i'll post it here if people would find that interesting?

In the meantime i seem to now be officially in a band, after much talking about it the Z Stacks (pronounced ZED) have now actually got together and played together a few times. As a person with no knowledge of music theory it sounded pretty awesome to me, though now i have to write some words to these songs.................

Friday, 27 February 2009

Lux Interior RIP


Guess I never will get to see them live then. Bugger.

Friday, 30 January 2009


Now, to make up for a lack of activity recently i shall tell thee about my favorite part of my shitty job, namely, i get to change all the posters and things every week :), this is good because it helps top me up with some actual enthusiasm on a regular basis, a thing which is hard to come by in my cinema, where most of the staff and especially the general manager have very little interest in films and i sometimes feel like i'm butting agaisnt a brick wall of general indifference.
The posters are my escape from that, a way to have little creative control of a sort, or promote films i want to do well, things i'm excited about, though of course the art of it is keeping a good balance of movies that will attract everyone, though the idiots in charge have been obstructing me there as well lately.

Apparently we are no longer permitted to display posters
for horror films, at any point, regardless of the fact that we do very well off of them, because we have now been arbitrarily designated a 'family cinema' and these posters (which are approved for ALL AUDIENCES by the bbfc) may frighten small children, this is bullshit.

Now i'm not a huge fan of horror films, i find them to be for the most part lazy and unimaginative, though when they are i can enjoy them very much, however i resent being told i can't display a picture of a hockey mask with a date on it because its 'frightening'
a huge part of our audience is for those shitty horror films, they usually come on a friday night, buy loads of food then leave complaining about how shit the film was, then come back next week to watch another one. By intentionally excluding this audience we may really harm ourselves, by comparison in my three years of cinema life i have never once encountered a child disturbed by a poster, not even the ones for Saw or Hostel, nor was i ever disturbed during my childhood by any of the posters for late 80's early 90's shit horror films, and they could be quite twisted.
In Conclusion if anyone wants to really do me a favour you could wander down to my cinema (cineworld rochester) and start kicking up a fuss about why there's no friday 13th poster, preferably to a manager please :)
today i have been listening to the TECHNICOLOR WEB OF SOUND, a truly wonderful psychedelic web radio station, the random old 60s adverts that sometimes pop up between songs are what really top of their excellent selection
thats all for now, i'll probably see yas next month

Friday, 19 December 2008

A Cautionary Tale

Today I have a story for you, I think it illustrates quite nicely the reason why I hate most of the Great British public, and probably why they don’t seem to like me that much either.
I was driving to work last week, on a part of my route that uses a dual carriageway, I was in the outside lane doing about 60 (the limit being 50) and was following a car doing about the same speed when a man driving a blue Mondeo (hereafter referred to as Mondeo Man) came roaring up behind me and flashing his lights, I detest this kind of behaviour at the best of times, but even if I had got over he’d have still been stuck behind the other car who would then also have to make way for this king of the road, so naturally I stayed where I was, also there was a slip road a little way ahead with quite a few cars joining the inside lane, but before all that Mondeo man obviously could wait no longer and undertook me, now this does happen to people every so often (even when they are already breaking the speed limit!) and I thought little of it until I, having passed the slip road and moved into the inner lane, observed that Mondeo man was up ahead not actually going all that fast, simply by doing my normal cruising speed I undertook him and went on my way.
For Mondeo man, this was it, presumably to him my act of undertaking was an unbearable slight on his manhood, especially since it came from a scruffy bespectacled youth in a purple Nissan Micra, he now had to prove himself a man by not conceding defeat.
I of course couldn’t give a flying fuck, this strange duel had come about by me simply driving along at my normal speed, but if I could, I hoped I would show Mondeo man the foolishness of such aggression.
After progressing a little way down the road and across a few roundabouts, suddenly there he was again roaring past me with an expression like he was about to explode and a vast repertoire of abusive gestures, my response to this was to laugh and pull an expression of mock surprise/shock in the style of Frankie Howerd. This was to play up to his probable belief that I was a homosexual (an assumption people sometimes make when they see me in my car). His reaction, as I suspected it would be, was to grow even more annoyed, there was a great deal of flailing, and some more gestures and I suspect foul language was in use as well.
Now he did something that surprised me a little, we were now on a single carriageway and Mondeo man began to gradually slow down and then held his speed at 15. This was obviously meant to annoy me, however I was wise to the act, having pulled this trick myself before on aggressive drivers. I had well over 20 minutes to get to work, more than enough time and my adversary had up to now only displayed impatience so I doubted he had the discipline to keep this manoeuvre up for very long. To further undermine him I made a big show of laughing more and singing along joyfully to a song playing on my ipod at the time, true enough after about 50 yards he gave up and drove away, and I carried on to work.
In conclusion, sometimes I can be an evil cunt, and one of life’s great pleasures is pissing off aggressive drivers, mainly because it’s so easy, they let themselves get annoyed by silly things.
Also today we have me review of the year, in preparation for being in a drunken haze for much of Christmas I’m going to post it now.

Mr Rob’s Review of the Year 2008

Top Films

In Bruges
The Dark Knight
Son Of Rambow
No Country For Old Men
There Will Be Blood
Sweeney Todd
The Assassination of Jesse James by the Coward Robert Ford
Death Race (far better than it had any right to be)

Top Old Film Discovered This Year

Raw Deal, Utterly wonderful shit Arnie action film.
"you should not drink, and bake!"

Top Albums

Seasick Steve - I Started Out With Nothing and I Still got most of it left
Nick Cave & The Bad Seeds - Dig!!! Lazarus Dig!!!
Drive-By Truckers - Brighter Than Creations Dark
The Raconteurs - Consolers Of the Lonely
The Wildhearts - Stop us if you’ve hear this one before Vol. 1
(honourable mention for AC/DC and Nicole Atkins)
Top Albums Discovered This Year
Wintersleep - Welcome To The Night Sky
Big Star - #1 Record/Radio City/In Space
The Replacements - Let It Be Reissue
The Cramps - Big Beat From Badsville
Ziltoid The Omniscient

Top Events

Meeting Francesca.
First Holiday without family, escape to Suffolk.
Seeing Grindhouse at Prince Charles Cinema.
Urban Exploring with Aaron
Dressing Up as the Joker and running the Bat-Bar for the Dark Knight opening weekend.
Discovering that I know how to draw.

Merry Christmas all! And much love. x

Friday, 5 December 2008

Good Things.

A comedian Dan and I will be going to see soon, we'll be sitting in row C, so i'm trying not to be too conspicuous.

Some models i quite fancy geeking out over, but would have to order from america.

A cool album i just downloaded after a quite frustrating wait as the artist in question is prone to releasing limited editions to artificially inflate demand, cunning bugger.

A Movie, adapted from a comic book. Last Halloween i went to a party dressed as the man on the right and nobody knew who i was, hopefully they'll all have their little moment of private epiphany when they watch the movie.
I'm off Christmas shopping today so here's hoping i survive all the sales-people desperately trying to get me to buy things
coming soon - Mr Rob's Review of the Year

Monday, 24 November 2008

As Lion-o might say, Sutton HO!!!!

though actually it's Sutton Hoo.

This is what all the fuss is about, a collection of mounds in a field that apparently contain the burials of pagan anglo-saxons of great note, nobles and possibly kings, as you can see it was looking quite beautiful by the time we arrived there.

Being twenty sonething men we didn't even consider leaving till about eleven, now that part of suffolk is all of three hours drive from our lovely town (pity me, the driver :S, actually dont. the whole thing was my idea.), though it was really cool to go on a bona fide road trip with Dan and John, a right laugh, and John got to have his first experience of a little chef, quite how he's got to 22 and never been in one i'll never know, but he said it felt like he was in a tarantino movie. To be fair this essex little chef did have a slightly pulp fictiony feel to it.

The Sutton Hoo sight is run by the national trust, which i feel always adds an aditional air of enjoyment to any visit on account of the very stuffy nature of a lot of the signage about the place, it's like lt's being run by the WI


this one is obviously meant to prevent attack from hippies.

and slightly more ominously.....

Sutton Hoo is most famous for the ship burial discovered there intact and filled with the unplundered treasure of a great lord (possibly Readwald, a Saxon High King) including the only example of an anglo saxon helmet, hence the giant one outside the visitor centre door.
This helmet was too small for my enormous head, sadly. but john and dan seem to be enjoying themselves.
In conclusion we had a great time being geeks for a day (or rather, even bigger geeks ) more trips of this nature can only be a good thing.
last track listened too: Creedence Clearwater Revivial - Run Through The Jungle